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Wednesday, 11 May 2016


With the exception of shopping for jeans (which takes about a month to psych yourself up for) trying to find the perfect swimming costume or bikini has got to be the world's toughest job. 

No joke, I've spent weeks trying to find the perfect one to suit my body shape; one that isn't too revealing and is of a decent quality....and nada. Nothing. Zilch. Empty handed. I'm so bored of trailing through websites or clothing rails looking for one that I actually like and am willing to spend money on.

Life is V hard.

1. This is going to be so easy.

2. Like, literally all I'm looking for is a plain black swimming costume. How hard can it be to find that?

3. But it has to be underwired because I'm scared my boobs will look saggy.

4. And maybe include a cute print on it...either at the top or a lil cut out at the side.

5. Obviously, it must come with detachable straps to make sure I don't get any tan lines.

6. And be of good material....but at an affordable price.

7. Yup, this will be a doddle. No problem at all.

8. *opens up ASOS*

9. There are 23092 items in your search.

10. PERFECT. There are loads to choose from.

11. Why are all the models so tanned and toned?

12. Why am I not that tanned and toned?!

13. Because I have an unhealthy relationship with wine and pizza. That's why.


15. *only shows sizes 8 or 18*

16. Cool, never mind. Didn't like that one anyway.

17. Nope, that one is disgusting.

18. That one is ok, I suppose.

19. Nope, keep scrolling.

20. HA! Who would honestly buy that?! 

21. Why are bikini's always sold separately? You think you've found a great deal but turns out you've only bought half the bloody product.

22. Ridiculous.

23. Oh my gosh. My time has come. 

24. I've found the perfect one. This is it, miracles happen and dreams really do come true. It ticks everything on my list.

25. £58. Are you kidding me.

26. For a swimming costume?!!

27. *throws up and tries to convince yourself that the £23 one you saw earlier isn't actually that bad.

28. But deep down you know its hideous and will do nothing to cover the cellulite on your bum.

29. Realises that this mission is impossible, and that it is so unfair that nowhere stocks the item you want.

30. I mean, your requests weren't that specific. 

31. It was only a plain black swimming costume.

32. That had to be exactly what you wanted, with no compromises and under £40. You're not made of money after all.

33. *opens up another store's website and starts the process again*

It's a never-ending circle.

1 comment:

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